Gifts, Guests, and Gratitude
Re-energizing communities through more thoughtful study abroad

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By Karen Rodriguez

Students often bring token gifts for their host families, items that symbolize the good intentions that can’t always be articulated the first night they arrive. These ritual presentations of small mementos of Americana nonetheless belong to what writer Lewis Hyde (The Gift, 1983), sees as the market economy—polite as they are, they constitute a symbolic exchange, a culturally sanctioned payment for services (food, language practice, friendship, and laundry) about to be rendered. What about other sorts of gifts, of real gratitude and deep reciprocity? What about the gift, he says, that “speaks commandingly to the soul and irresistibly moves us?” What about the gift that circulates and has something to do with relationships?

Study abroad, much like the rest of higher education, tends to be packaged as a commodity. Perhaps we should talk less about what students get from it and more about what they give away both during and after it. Basing his work on traditional gift-oriented societies, Hyde argues that “the spirit of a gift is kept alive by its constant donation.” Could study abroad be seen not only as a gift to receive, but also to give away? Could study abroad promote the circulation of gifts in a way that re-energizes people and communities far beyond the receivers’ hands?

SERVICE AS A BASKET OF MANGOS

Hyde sings the praises of perishable, consumable gifts that cannot be hoarded. In the States, “stuff” can and is stockpiled all too regularly, which causes unquantifiable unhappiness and alienation from others. In other places, however, the best gifts are not knick-knacks or durable goods, but consumable items to be shared and passed on. In Mexico, for example, food rotates faster than cash—if a basket of mangos comes your way, the first thing you do is divide it into smaller portions for your mother-in-law, your neighbor, and your secretary. You never look down and say, “here’s a month’s worth of mangos for my household, no expensive fruit bill this month.”

Gifts are meant to circulate, says Hyde; and if consumed with others, they bring people together.

Community service, which usually refers to helping those who are less privileged or those who suffer in a particularly difficult way, functions much like these consumable gifts because the acts of kindness they contain inspire a flow of kindness outward toward others. This is one area where study abroad students give and give.

Privileged in access to education abroad, no matter how they got there, students are quick to recognize that with privilege comes the wonderful ability to give things away, namely such intangible, consumable goods as empathy, friendship, and dialogue.

When students go into rural communities to teach, share, and help, they are giving back something that has been instilled in them. They are, consciously or not, thanking their parents or other role models via those they reach out to. Yet, despite all they give and despite our résumé-obsessed culture, students onsite rarely talk about how much effort they expended or enumerate the tangible “gots” in terms of their marketable skills. Instead they speak of what the community or organization gave them and how indebted they feel. They speak to the need to go home and do more, or to come back and do more. Study abroad in these terms supports Hyde’s assertion that “a gift will continue to discharge its energy so long as we attend to it in return.” These are students who conceive of study abroad and service as gifts, and who attend to them as such.

EVERYDAY RECIPROCITY

These are invaluable experiences, and volunteerism should be promoted anywhere possible. But I would also underline the presence of less glamorous, everyday generosity and reciprocity. Students receive immaterial gifts every day, such as a shopkeeper’s patience, an encouraging smile, the honesty and goodwill of those who could easily dupe them but do not, and the interest with which they are engaged. When they stay with host families, they receive infinite acts of kindness and tolerance, and they receive much the same from fellow students who help through days of doubt.

These everyday gifts are paid back in kind. Students pay attention to unheard stories, empathize with others’ pain, and provide laughs and smiles to many hungry for human connection. These simple gifts, however, are rarely recognized in public. They are not mentioned on transcripts or factored into grades. This type of giving is not required or even suggested in the pre-departure literature students receive, yet it emerges onsite and fosters cross-cultural understanding. These gifts are just as important as the donations of effort and goodwill within a recognized community service framework. Indeed, those who believe deeply in service as an act of selflessness would probably argue that these gifts are essential components of any true contribution.

THE POWER OF GRATITUDE

Over the last 10 years without fail, when I have wondered if study abroad is the right place to be doing something useful in the world, I have received a moving e-mail from an old student about some wonderful thing she’s doing, or another student shows up at the office shining with new possibilities that exploded while he was abroad. This is another untold gift we receive in study abroad and probably the least spoken about. Professionals in study abroad, like students, are fueled by the gift. Those who engage in the profession long-term undoubtedly see their work as service, something one does for a higher cause rather than for glory, wealth, or recognition. However, these small acts on the part of students inspire unfathomable gratitude. I would argue that most in the field find that these tiny gifts are what send them rushing back to their desks.

IN FAVOR OF RE-GIFTING

“…A gift that can’t be given away ceases to be a gift,” writes Hyde. It becomes simply a commodity, or in the case of study abroad, a foreign trinket that sits in the back of the closet getting dusty. Study abroad is the sort of gift that you can give away in a myriad of forms in as many places you step into. These gifts are passed around and build up a small but significant positive energy in the world. Most importantly, in Hyde’s words, they fill us with “courage for living” in a world where courage is certainly needed.